Loki Goes A-Coning.

Har Loki

And let me be the first to say it in non-feline language; it does not please him one little bit. Not an iota.

It all started when his face blew up. At least, that’s what it looked like. Also, I’m really freaked out by wounds so… I might be exaggerating. Whatever, it was still bad, and he needed to go to the vet asap. To skip all the stuff I can’t make more interesting, he had corrective surgery and we brought him home the evening of that day oh and Baker Animal Clinic is awesome. Wait, now I’m sort of saying that I can make the rest more interesting, oh STFU BRAIN.

When they brought his cage to us, he refused to acknowledge our existence, and instead stared straight ahead while looking like he was trying to shit out a pineapple. That changed when we popped into the car to go home. Now we had a Loki who looked like he was shitting out a pineapple while also having some one yank really hard on his tail in a staccato rhythm. *Googles “staccato” before using it just because it popped into my head as the proper word… becomes entirely too pleased with her subconscious.* Then, that look never leaving his face, he spent the 10 minute drive home cursing us at ear-shattering volume in what I must assume must have been the most foul, depraved, cruel words known to felinese.


*Side note: You know what’s really creepy? When you get into a house that you KNOW has no other people in it, and your friend’s cat calls “Hello??” in a querulous voice from the next floor up in perfectly legible English. Especially if you had no idea her cat was capable of that. Her second attempt wasn’t as impressive, but I swear it sounded JUST like Kim Jong Il saying “Hello” in Team America.

Now he spends his time walking around looking like a drunk who put the lampshade on backwards. I may soon need to put a “Wide turns!” sign on his ass. He wasn’t a particularly graceful cat to begin with. He has a hard time aiming the cone of his food dish sometimes, and he seems to get massively offended when I try to help him by pulling the cone gently into a better position.

loki fuckyou


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