A Treatise on Vanity, and Our Obsession with Image over Substance.

Sounds pretty pompous doesn’t it? I’m just getting started.

We, at least, every single human being I know or have ever heard of, is likely to be more strongly swayed by something’s image than by the meat of the thing. To varying degrees of course, but in the end, we all do it. It makes sense to do it, sight tends to be our first independently verifiable experience of a thing. We’re programmed to give it priority. If someone is coming at me with a gun, I’m far safer to assume it is both real and an imminent threat and react accordingly, than to wait until I have a chance to determine whether it is indeed a real gun, and not a popcap shooter or something. If I’m wrong about it being real, I overreact and potentially look like an idiot. If I’m wrong about it being fake, I could easily be maimed or killed before I could find out for sure. Thus my better bet is to judge on sight alone as quickly as possible, rather than waiting for more info and giving the person with the gun more time to harm me.

Seeing how vital this can be to our well-being, is it any wonder it is so strongly ingrained in us? Unfortunately it also leads us to make absolutely bizarre jumps in logic and actions. My example of this for today is: Twilight. And to be fair, similar vampire love stories of a tragic young thing finding love in the arms of an ageless and immortal being of infinite beauty, grace and intellect. How many romances could be more enticing? To be young and naive, yet loved by a creature who has lived so much longer than you, who has experienced so much more of life. One who has so much more knowledge and power, and yet is still enthralled with you, despite your lacks.

Back to Twilight. So, We have Bella, a 17 year old girl, who falls in love with Edward a 104 year old vampire, turned when he was also 17 years old.

You know who else was 104 years old? This guy:

Herman Smith-Johannsen (Radio Canada)

Hot, amirite guys?! What 17 year old girl wouldn’t want to jump that? (He actually does look pretty good for 1o4.)

No? Why not? Because he doesn’t have the body of a 17 year old? That’s the only difference. The image; the packaging.

(And while I’m at it, what 104 year old would be able to stand a 17 year old partner? It would drive me nuts. Even when I was 17. 104 year olds that are hot for 17 year olds kinda skeeve me out.)

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